September 1985

I grew up in Chester, VA, about 2 hours away from Virginia Beach. When I was a Thrasher-aged kid, I would occasionally get to go visit Mt. Trashmore, the giant skatepark built on a mountain of garbage. I could only imagine that is why this episode of Skarfing Material has Chef Boy-Am-I-Hungry in Virginia Beach. There's no other reason I could imagine wanting to go there (The last time I went, I got carjacked by a crackhead, for real).. and I can certainly see the police there not being too cool. If you want a good picture of the place he's talking about, dig out your copy of Future Primitive and watch the Trashmore segment. I'm glad I don't live in Virginia anymore.
CRAP SANDWICHES
They say that a turd with glitter sprinkled on it is still a turd, and I'm going to add that a smore with sunflower kernels sprinkled on it is still a smore. Call it a crap sandwich if you like, but it's juust a goddamned smore with peanut butter and sunflower kernels. What's the deal with the sunflower kernels, anyway? They added no flavor or texture to the dish. But yeah, it's just a smore.

ingredients for CRAP SANDWICHES

about to put the lids on..

READY 2 SKARF!

March 1986

Sorry it's been a couple weeks since I updated. Truth be told, doing this project made me gain ten pounds. I've gone on a diet since then, and now I don't really get the opportunity to make as much Skarfing Material as I'd like. Don't worry, I'm still gonna finish this project, it just might take a while, I'm not racing against the clock like Julie did in the movie (I heard in real life she got REALLY fat and her husband left her), so I'm gonna just take it slow. It probably won't hurt to start up again with something a little healthier, like the
TORTELGAGGA-NAG-NAG with a zesty NO IF, AND, OR BUT SAUCE
Chef Boy-Am-I-Hungry really likes to give cool-sounding names to boring-tasting food. This wasn't even that boring, the sauce was pretty good, if a little watery. I used whole wheat tortellini because it's probably healthier, I guess. At the end of it all I had a very decent pasta dinner.

everything you need to make TORTELGAGGA-NAG-NAG with a zesty NO IF, AND, OR BUT SAUCE

 and the completed dish